Monday, January 14, 2008

Camaro's Gang - Fuerza Major


boomp3.com
Fuerza Major [Extended Version].mp3

At the time that I wrote my post on Miko Mission's How Old Are You?, I had not yet heard Fuerza Major (1985) by Camaro's Gang, and I think that I have to say that Fuerza Major is an even better Italo Disco track. This song is absolutely magnificent, and one of the most beautiful things I have ever heard. It's a really bizarre and interesting song, too; most of the time you have absolutely no idea what the hell they're talking about. And the title itself is odd too because "Major" isn't a word in Spanish (yes, this song is Italian), whereas "Mayor" is. Only a couple of releases spelled the word correctly, but the band seemed fine with the missppelling. It essentially means "Greater Force", which I think is kind of cool. And there's a mixture of what I think is Spanish and English during the song, with the English being typically kind of...grammatically incorrect.

Like many dance songs, this one begins with a simple beat. We hear weird, totally synthetic harp-like flourishes that are kind of like a Disney soundtrack or something, and then: a beastly bassline comes in. The emotional table is set, and now it's time for the main course. Then, the main hook. God, this thing is gorgeous. It's so simple and earnest, with this youthful fragility and hopefulness. Then we hear the woman say a bunch of non-sensical stuff that lends the whole thing a light air of almost campy humor. Then the hook drops out and we just have her and the bassline (and the beat). Then a guy comes in, speaking in English. He says something about fate, and having seen this lass once before at the discoteque, and now he "won't forget you anymore", which I think is kind of a beautiful line. They connect visually with a smile, and then dance. There's something so simple and poetic about this, and the way he words it. I have to admit that I am a sucker for songs with lyrics about music and dancing, and connecting with people through that. Sure, it's kind of shallow, but there can be real connections made. And one thing that I've discovered is that while there can be truckloads of babes that get you going, there are very few that truly, truly drive you wild. That's one major thing about the bar scene and partying and so forth that I've discovered - that although there may be many appealing options out there that you come across constantly, it's rare that you see one that just completely captures you and instills a desire in you that goes beyond the merely sexual, one that you find absolutely, devastatingly beautiful, one whom you can sense and read (whether truthfully or not) emotionally, perhaps even sensing a deeper connection. And sometimes when you find someone and you just feel an unbelievably strong sexual attraction to them, that can be meaningful. Sure, it doesn't necessarily mean anything to want to diddle someone, but when it's really, REALLY strong, it can mean something. That kind of desire is important when it comes to having a lasting, successful relationship, I think, and when you meet someone that you feel that way about immediately, it's golden goose. At least for me, when I feel that way I also feel emotionally attracted to them; I feel a kind of caring even if I've never spoken to them simply because I think they are absolutely ravishingly beautiful and they embody this perfect femininity. I mean, maybe the difference is how when you walk down the street, you can see loads of people you want to fuck, but rarely do you see one that you want to make love to. Does that make sense?

"I was here and you were there / When you just touched me with your smile..." I love this, because I'm really interested in the way that all people are separate, but use emotion and communication to bridge that gap (see the "One Too Many Mornings" post below). Simply a smile can make you feel touched and connected, and that kind of connection can feel so full, so intense, so frantic, when you're out partying at a club. I mean, isn't that kind of the point of going out dancing? To find that connection, to meet someone who touches you? I mean, sometimes you really do just go out to have fun with your friends and you don't worry about meeting anyone, but I think it's often in the back of your mind. "What if I meet The One tonight? What if she's here and I don't know it yet? What if it's fate? What if it's ordained by a greater force, a fuerza mayor?" These thoughts are usually bullshit, but I think that they're there. I've found that things just happen when I have an open mind, and when I go out to have fun. They are rarely profound, but there's often a lot of fun, and things can feel profound in a way. I think it can be great when fun becomes profound (I think Scotch's Italo Disco classic "Disco Band" is one of the ultimate songs at evoking this feeling). And sometimes you get this sensation of profundity, of cinematic beauty, even when you're just standing there dancing like an idiot with your friends or maybe someone you just met. You get so swept up in the moment, and that can be beautiful.

But is this feeling a lie? In some ways, it is, but in others, it isn't. Every moment is beautiful, every breath is to be savored. Sometimes I feel like when I'm in high spirits with my friends it can be easier to remember this. I start laughing all the time and I just get jovial. I mean, I probably annoy the sober people with my enthusiasm. But at the same time, I don't think this is the means through which to experience truly deep beauty and happiness. I mean, it's definitely not. You have to find that beauty when you're sober too, when things are peaceful and you're completely in yourself, as well. Being drunk all the time does most definitely not equal happiness, needless to say. But sometimes it's just really fun, and it can be beautiful for a short moment in time.

Here the lyrics are hard for me to decipher. But I can tell you, that once that gorgeous synth line comes in, it all seems like the words of some mythical truth-beast that's descended from the heavens to enlighten us. "...Only for you..." When he says that, it makes me want to cry. Seriously. But again, I can't stop thinking about how the whole thing seems to just be about some lass he met at a discotheque. But does it matter? That's the thing that I think is at the heart of the millions of songs and movies about love that is obviously shallow. I mean, most on-screen romances are a bunch of fluff, just like meeting someone at a club. But again - does it matter? I don't know the answer to this, because it can feel amazing, no matter what. And sometimes those things do turn into great loves that change your life.

This makes me think a lot about love in general, and dating. I was talking about this with a close friend recently; I feel less romantic and sensitive than I used to. I think I've really taken the idea to heart that, to date (especially in New York), you have to not give a shit about it. And as awesome as it would be if I met a wonderful girl and fell in love and became her boyfriend, I also just don't give a shit about it. Sometimes I feel a desire for that to happen, but then I just sit there and listen to Arthur Russell's "Being It" and it just sort of goes away. I feel myself dismantling my desire further and further, but am I taking it too far? This song moves me so much, but do I really relate to it like I would have a few years ago? Is my letting go of desire numbing me as a person? Am I losing a bit of my humanity? Even now, when I like a girl, I don't feel as romantic as I used to, I'm not as inspired to do something to "sweep her off her feet". It used to be just because I didn't want to come on too strong, but now I think maybe I just don't give a rat's ass. However, it's also totally true that I haven't met anyone really amazing in a long time, either, and that could be it, too. Dating in New York is brutal and I think naturally kind of numbs a lot of its participants.

But I still believe in love; there's no question about that. I just think it's really rare, and maybe my standards are too high now. Yet I still have this kind of longing (ironically) to let go of desire for love and lose that part of my humanity. Maybe I'm too into eastern philosophy. Yet songs like this still excite me, and I enjoy feeling that kind of desire sometimes. It's fun. There's also the ever-popular trap of getting too into feeling shallow sexual desires and pursuing them at the expense of potentially finding love. I just haven't really found anyone that special, and that bums me out, but I also sort of don't care and don't expect it to happen. Is this healthy or unhealthy? Maybe I've become too masculine, too.

But regardless, this song is beautiful, and what it describes is beautiful, too. And you know what? I'm not numb to it, and I definitely relate to it. I think I will always love stuff like this and the kind of real-life, situational feeling it describes and evokes. Emotion isn't our enemy; it just has to be controlled, and it must be seen past. I think there are different kinds of emotion, some deeper than others. Many of them are borne of our egos, our minds, but some come from the heart and beyond. When something truly touches your soul, it can be very emotional. But I think the thing is that when that happens, it is also felt most deeply as a non-emotion, a sensation. Emotion pertains to investment, it is created by it and depends upon it. The deepest things have nothing to do with personal investment, because they are beyond the self.

But can one really live thinking like this? This is what I'm struggling with right now. I really believe in getting past the self, but for one to devote their life to it, they basically have to be a monk or something. But I mean, sexual desire and attraction is about the self, unless you feel it more deeply. I get so invested sometimes in that desire and that feeling and finding those little sparks in the night, but is it all an illusion?

Perhaps it doesn't matter, even if it is. Live in the moment - that's what I always say. This song is all about that; it's about feeling that spark, feeling the drive (a la Doctor's Cat) and going wild with it. This song is ecstatic, and I frequently fall into a state of minor ecstasy when I hear it. How beautiful is this? How beautiful is it to be inspired by another? Even if it goes nowhere significant, even if you don't end up marrying the person, those small moments can be beautiful, and they can be little moments of glory that you can always look back on. Attraction is a major force, and one that can bring people together.

Maybe that's it - maybe this song is a celebration of when our genitals get it right, when that force brings people together who are meant to be together in more than just a sexual way. I mean, isn't that how many of us have met the greatest loves of our lives? Haven't many of our greatest romances come from first thinking that someone was really, really smokin' hot? I know that's happened with me before. I mean, you can't deny the emotion in this song; it's not a shallow song, and even the lyrics speak of something deep, major. "Only for you..."

Enjoy this strange classic.